Later on Wednesday afternoon, Drew casually suggested we eat at home and go grab a couple of pints. I gladly accepted some pints with my boo! He then texted me a bit later asking if I could be ready by 7:20. I immediately knew something was up. A BIRTHDAY something, which I generally hate. 7:20? Why would he want me ready by such a specific time? Another out-of-town friend texted me last week saying she was sorry she couldn't celebrate my birthday with me but we'd celebrate when she got back. How did she even know it was my birthday? I was looking forward to a very low-key birthday this year, aside from our weekend trip, with no one here knowing about it and not celebrating it with anyone. But my adoring husband decided to forego my deepest wishes and plan a little birthday get-together with some of my pals here against my will. I may or may not have freaked out on him and acted a fool. I know how I sound: "My husband planned a birthday get together for me and I'm PISSED!" I don't mean it like that. I just hate hate hate making people feel obligated to do something for my birthday, or anything, and I hate attention, and from what I could gather and piece together, he'd invited friends/people from all of my different groups here. I'd have to introduce everyone and have anxiety about everyone chatting it up the whole time! UUGGGHHH! And then Drew felt bad that I was having so much anxiety so then I started crying cause I felt so guilty about my sweet husband planning a birthday surprise for me and me not appreciating it. Shit.
I'm very happy to report that the evening went really well, and it was really fun, and I felt very special and loved, despite a lot of nervous wine drinking and some sweating.
Here's a pic of me and my pals that came! Missy (and Tom, not pictured - we met them at the 4th of July party our first week here), Tracy (from PWC with Drew, yall should know her by now), Tori and Lauren B. (from the American Women's group), a tall nervous sweating person, and Carrie (who I met through Kara, when she visited).
Everyone started leaving and Tori and Lauren stayed with us, and we were talking about how it's now our third month here and how we should start to feel settled between 3 and 6 months. According to people. Tori said "You've only been here 3 months and you just had a birthday function with 6 of your friends, and several couldn't make it - I'd say you're gonna be FINE." And when she put it like that, and when Drew said he just wanted me to be around people that know me and like me and care about me tonight for my early birthday in another country, I started to feel all warm and fuzzy inside and very, very blessed. I do have friends. And they all left their warm homes on a rainy Wednesday night to come celebrate with me against my will! That's a huge blessing. And I got a birthday package from Kathleen and Lindsay today which made me feel good too! I write all this not to brag or emphasize/talk about my birthday that I generally hate celebrating and addressing, but to focus on the positive and appreciation I feel for things like this. When you spend a lot of your time here feeling like an insecure bozo, wondering why you can't find a job or speak French or find ground turkey at a grocery store, it's nice to be GRATEFUL for the things you have here! Like friends.
This'll be my last post until Monday, as we're jetting off to gay Pareeeee (Paris) at 6:20AM (yikes) for a little getaway! I'll post all about the trip then.
Have a great weekend! Au revoir!
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